Gulong-gulo ang isip ko sa mga nakaraang araw. Sunod-sunod yata ang mga dagok sa aking buhay. Nagsimula ito noong nawala ang aking pinakamamahal na lolo.
Ang kanyang biglaang pagkawala ay isa sa mga pangyayaring hinding-hindi ko makakalimutan sa buong buhay ko. Isa kasi siya sa mga taong humubog sa akin. Sa kanya ako humuhugot ng lakas sa mga panahong magulo ang aking buhay. Siya ang isa sa mga taong naniniwala na kayang-kaya kong lagpasan ang mag unos sa aking buhay.
Ika-21 ng Agosto, recital ko noon. Hindi naging maganda ang gising ko. Parang may mali. Parang may hindi tama. Ni hindi ko nga naitugtog ng maayos ang piano ko sa sobrang alala. Kinabahan ako. Yung kabang hindi mo mawari kung para saan. Malakas ang kabog ng aking dibdib.
Hindi ko natugtog ng tama ang piano ko noong umagang iyon. Mag-tatatlong minuto na ang nakalipas pero ganoon pa din ang aking naramdaman. Halong pangamba at takot. Hindi ko maintindihan. Kaya naisipan ko na lang na kunan ng video ang iba pang mga recitalists sa pag-aakalang mawawala din iyon.
"May tag nay mamatay, aron mu-okey na ang tanan sa COPA (Sana nama'y merong mamatay para maging okey na ang lahat sa COPA)," pabiro kong sinabi sa aking kaibigan.
"Bitaw sa?! (Oo nga ano?!)," sagot ng aking kaibigan.
"Lage. Kay ngano mang kinahanglan pa nga nay mamatay aron mawala ning kaplastikan diri na (Oo nga. Ba't pa naman kasing kelangan me mamatay para mawala ang kaplastikan dito)."
"Ana jud na (Ganyan talaga 'yan)."
Tawanan kaming lahat.
May konting katahimikan. Balik na naman kami sa mga recitalists.
"Kabalo ba mo, katong elementary pa ko, sige mig kuyog sa akong lolo (Alam niyo ba, yung lolo ko noong nasa elementarya pa ako, palagi kaming magkasama)."
"Mao ba?! Gaunsa man diay mo? (Talaga?! Ano naman ang ginagawa ninyo?)"
"Iya kong kuyugon sa mercado na (Isasama niya ako sa mercado)."
"Nya? (Tapos?)"
"Wa ra. Nakahinumdum ra ko nga kuyog mig palit ug pantat. Uli na tana mi, nya natagbu-an man namu iyang amigo sa taytay. Wa siya kabalo nga hadlok kaayo ko anang taytay kay sige baya nag uyog kung mu-agi nang mga sakyanan (Wala lang. Naalala ko na magkasama kaming bumili ng pantat. Uuwi na sana kami noong nakasalubong namin yung kaibigan niya. Hindi niya alam na takot ako sa tulay. Umaalog kasi kapag dumadaan ang mga sasakyan)."
itutuloy...
P.S. Naisipan ko pong hindi ituloy ang nailathala ko noong nakaraang linggo. May mga bagay na kailangan kong taguin sa mga panahong ito. Nawa'y maunawaan ninyo. Maraming salamat po!
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14 comments:
My condolonces on your lolo's passing.
my condolences.
hope you are alright.
hey. welcome back. hope you're alright.
@mr. scheez: yeah. salamat... and thanks for dropping by.
@kiks: i do certainly hope that i am alright. i will be. thanks kiks.
@echo: yeah. nice to be back. yes, i will be alright. salamat.
My condolences, Mico.
Na-miss namin ang mga lathala mo. (Okay ba Filipino ko?)
Just keep your lolo's memories alive. I'm sure he doesn't want you to remain sad.
Wow, you play the piano! :)
my prayers and condolences mico
Thanks for visiting my blog.
Condolence...
Regards to Ma'am Sue, my friend since high school. I met her didto sa wedding ni JR and Crystal. Congratulations on your wonderful singing!
my condolences again. i know your lolo was very proud of you. and he's watching, for sure.
man, i've always wanted to learn to play the piano but i suck at it. big time.
tudlui ko beh ;)
Proposed Names:
A. Pink Bloggers Guild
B. The Pink Chronicles
C. Rainbow Blogs Philippines
D. Other suggested names that may arise
Goal:
To create a united community of Filipino LGBT Bloggers, that may act as an organization for aspiring LGBT writers and hone their skills by guiding , recognizing their works, and inspiring them to pursue an inner motivation for blogging whether it’s personal, informative or other reasons why they created their blog.
Functions:
a. Making a LGBT Bloggers Directory
b. Providing Weekly Reviews
c. Creating a weekly/ Monthly Award
d. Organizing a Monthly/Weekly chat conference
e. Gathering in an Annual/ Quarterly Eyeball
f. Participating in LGBT Advocacies
Proposed Committees:
a. Marketing and Networking. A separate committee shall search for potential blogs that can join the community and communicate with possible allies such as organizations, publications, etc. that may help in pursuing the goals of the said community.
b. Membership. A committee shall handle possible members of the community and review the contents of the blog whether it is related to the LGBT category or not. Upon approval of the committee, the blog shall now be placed in the Directory.
c. Reviews. A committee will have to conduct weekly reviews on a certain blog about the good features of the blog. Negative feedbacks to improve the blog shall not be posted on the review, it will be discussed in a private manner such as a personal mail to the author by the reviewer. The committee must ensure that all blogs shall be given a review. A member of the committee shall not create a review of his own blog.
d. Events. The committee shall create monthly events that will focus on the interactions between memb ers of the community. Such activities may be held online, via chat/conference, or in a general assembly/ eyeball gathering.
e. Awards. This committee shall conduct a surveys/poll sor other contest s that may recognize the LGBT blogger and his site, e.g. Pink Blog of the Week, or annual LGBT Blog Awards. The committee must have no bias in giving out awards.
f. Web Masters. This committee shall be composed of the committee heads of each team that may discuss on the overall design of the website, input necessary information, create posts, and act as the executive heads of the said community.
g. Other committees shall be created and some proposed above may be dissolved depending on the actual need of the community.
Provisions
a. As a part of the LGBT community, ethical principles must be upheld and violators of the community rules shall cause a member’s blog be out of the directory and he/she will be removed as a member of the said community. Possible violations: Plagiarism, Libel, etc.
b. It will be the discretion of the committee heads if they will include a blog that contains pornography or simple nudity. Proper judgment shall be applied.
c. Other provisions that might arise shall be discussed upon the completion of the said community.
Bloggers that agreed on the creation of the community:
a. Kiks of ABBA
b. Lyka Bergen of The Lyka Bergen Show
c. Mrs J of The Reigning Mizis
d. Jericho of Kape’t Yosi
e. Wilberchie of Wilberchie’s World
f. Yffar of The Rainbow Halohalo Project
g. other bloggers are all welcome to help in building this new community.
my condolences to you & the whole family. i pray for your immediate recovery.
I hope you'll be okay soon. *hugs*
sorry about your lolo...take your time...
pasensya ka na kung medyo nahuli ako.
ganunpaman, condolence mico.
kaya mo yan. *kurot sa cheeks*
(welkam bak sateng lahat)
:)
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