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Friday, January 8, 2010


Here I am again alone in the place I have called home for the past four years. I have sung every song, endured every pain, and shed every tear. I have lived a dream and I guess this is about that time when I have to wake up to the reality I have ignored for so long - to feel what I had to feel and cry until I cry no more.

It hasn't been easy. No, it wasn't.

I have nothing to boast for I am one ordinary being uncapable of turning people's heads. It is only MUSIC which gives life to my being. Without it, I am a nobody.

I begin to question myself, "What if I weren't a musician? What if I didn't know how to sing? What if I didn't have all these? Will still I be loved?" It pains me knowing that my chosen career path cannot feed a family nor sustain a man's life. But the only thing that I have always known, I was happy about it.

It was so selfish of me - to think about myself all the time. Nevertheless, there is no turning back now. Even if I were given another option, I would still be doing the same thing.

Often times, I wonder what life could have been for me if I weren't I am now.

Will I still be the me that I am now?

Will I still be meeting the same people?

Would have I still known love?

Would have I existed?

That'll forever be the question that would stir my mind.